the first post

by dorarandom

i have a friend a work! i have a work-friend, at last!

she started working at our office after labor day. today we went out for our first lunch together. we went to au bon pain.

there are not a lot of choices. and au bon pain is right around the corner. i always see this guy there who looks just like jean-luc marion. (i see him other places too—he must work in one of the buildings on our block—he seems lawyerly—in my head i started calling him ‘jean-luc marion’ and then i thought how funny it was that i always see him at au bon pain—)

but i digress. i was talking about how i seem to have a work-friend. she told me that i reminded her of someone on the show ‘girls.’ i had not heard of it. i wondered what sort of a show it was. i looked it up on wikipedia a few minutes ago. it sounds so horrible.  reading the article made me feel kind of — sick — i mean, i guess i would say that it made my soul feel queasy. [Apatow said he was drawn to Dunham’s imagination and added that Girls would provide men with an insight into “realistic females”. ] … i don’t know what that is even supposed to begin to mean … [The pilot intentionally references Sex and the City as producers wanted to make it clear that the driving force behind Girls is that the characters were inspired by the former HBO series and moved to New York to pursue their dreams. Dunham herself says she “revere[s] that show just as much as any girl of my generation.”] … does that mean that the girls on girls were inspired to move to new york because of sex and the city ? what is the force of that ‘and’? … i shouldn’t think about this … i should stop reading this article immediately …

and so i did.

but then i thought, ‘i think of Sex and the City a vile thing. but did i ever actually watch Sex and the City? i mean, was i ever actually exposed to whole episodes?’ i tried to remember.

i remembered. yes. i remember once being exposed to several consecutive episodes. i was taking a summer session of “intensive”/cram-style arabic. the summer between my junior and senior year of college. there were three or four other students in the course. we were all chicks. we experimented with hanging out. one friday night, at someone’s apartment, someone put on a dvd of Sex and the City — i could hardly even process the horror — i drank as much and as fast as i could —  then i excused myself and started lurching home. then, on my way home, i ran into a house party where i drank a bunch of those malt liquor booze-soda smirnoff things and got myself into a brutal sexual situation. then i got myself out of the brutal sexual situation and went out into the house’s backyard to sit and weep. then some chick from the house saw me sitting and weeping and came to talk to me — unfortunately, i said that i wished i was dead — the chick called an ambulance. and when an ambulance came — i was too young and too stupid to realize that i shouldn’t get into it. and so it ended up that i had to spend a weekend under observation in the mental ward. long story short.

i guess if i ever have to pitch a series to HBO, that will have to be the pilot.

oddly — maybe — i experienced a similar moment of soul-queasiness earlier today, almost first thing in the morning, when i decided to download ‘middlemarch’ on my kindle. (i have nothing in my apartment. not even george eliot. i have one chair, one lamp, two bed-like surfaces, three cats. and not much else, really.) the first search result was a book called ‘my life in middlemarch.’ i clicked on this. against my better judgment. in chiding myself for being too judgmental. and read the ‘book description.’ and well, apparently the book really is what the title says it is! some woman (‘a new yorker journalist’) has written a book about how her life has been just like middlemarch. about how her life has been just like middlemarch, so far, lo these many years, while she has been reading middlemarch and thinking about how her life is just like middlemarch. apparently. (silly memoirs by lady memoirists…?) i don’t know that the book has actually been published yet.


also notable at work today: i saw a huge roach. i mean. really, this was a substantial roach. the biggest roach i have ever seen outside of india. and i work in a supposedly upscale law firm in a supposedly upscale building in a mid-atlantic state. i didn’t really know quite what to do.

my boss stepped on it. he is really a good man.